Day 15

So D-Day for the gig had arrived and I spent most of the day holed up in my Uncle Eddie's flat trying to rehearse a little more, in between facebooking people back home. Every time I hit a bum note, I got pretty frustrated with myself. I wanted to give a good account of myself, the band and some of the songs I'd written for my family and friends who were coming along. Fe was off work today and spent most of it online with me in the front room. That said though, she was also making that classic Scottish dish of mince 'n' tatties (pictured below)! On one hand it smelt really good and I could tell that she had lobbed some carrots and onions into the mix. On the other hand I was worried about smelling like vegetables tonight—I used to work in a kitchen and came home smelling like that most nights—so I made a mental note to at least have a Glasgow shower before I headed to the venue. I phoned my Da as well and we chatted for a while about the football and the fact that they were having the upstairs rooms painted. My Ma was out, but I caught her on facebook later on for her own unique take on family problems! I managed to shift the conversation into something else, had had enough of that nonsense yesterday.


I wanted to play a gig in Toronto for family and friends who can't see me play normally, but also since our singer, and my best mate Michael, emigrated to Australia, I took over the singing mantle and I wanted to put myself to the test a little, vocally, musically but also from a confidence perspective. It's a right of passage, if you will, and harder when you're on your own. The venue was pretty cool, lit up by a funky neon sign outside (pictured below). It seemed a pretty typical rock venue, situated above a very packed restaurant —with a great reputation for nachos—with posters and stickers all over the place, sticky floors and an assortment of stools all along the bar and walls. I met the headline act, The Gay Blades, who were in soundchecking as I arrived. They were all really nice fellas, from NYC and signed to a label—triple crown records—too so their tour was paid for! I soundchecked shortly after them, on a very wobbly chair, which only took about five minutes. I played a bit of Sister I'm A Prophet, then quickly set about finding a chair that was on an even keel.


My Uncle Eddie's friend Roger came in before they started taking cash at the door and promptly started to unload all of his CDs onto me, which seemed to have a plethora of songs with the suffix 'blues' in their titles. He was clearly a soul who had suffered a lot in his life. He was trying to explain to me the meaning behind some of them, but the other band were soundchecking by this point and were drowning out much of what he was saying. He's a nice fella but I was kinda glad of that and even more glad to see April and her sister Trish arrive, along with my Uncle Eddie, Fe, my Da's cousin Lorraine and her husband Jamie, his other cousin Sylvia and her daughter Katherine, so I had a bit of a posse, which was cool. Was onstage at 9.45pm and I don't mind saying, I was bricking it a bit. I was a little ropey on the first two tracks, but by the time Sister I'm A Prophet came around, I found my form and grew in confidence. One thing I was conscious of was the fact that a lot of the time, I sing with my eyes closed. Maybe that was just a subconscious protection device, or maybe it's just me getting lost in the song. Yeah that sounds better I'll go with that.

Was buzzing by the time I came offstage, but was a bit embarrassed at signing autographs as an unsigned act and posing for so many pics, though I know that this is not a regular occurrence for my family here, coming to see me play that is. Was happy to talk to them all though, I'd like to think I'm shy but sociable and was even more delighted to get a few beers down my neck! My Uncle Eddie wasted no time in sampling Sneaky Dee's famous nachos and ordered a gigantic plate of them stacked high. I was too full of adrenaline to eat but everyone else attacked them at vulture speed. I made sure that the other bands, promoters and bar staff had a copy of my band's CD—best letting as many people as possible hear it. I bought one of The Gay Blades' t-shirts that read 'Your Band Name Sucks!' (pictured below) and told them to get in touch the next time they were playing in the UK and headed home with everyone for a nightcap at Uncle Eddie's. It was a great night!

Day 14

Today was a massive improvement guitar-wise. I managed to run through the setlist—my songs and the covers—with few hitches and the hitches I did have, I covered up pretty well. I guess that's the beauty of playing somewhere where you aren't known; you can get away with the odd blip here and there. I had planned to meet April today and hang around for a bit downtown. I think I said so before but she lived with her Mum, Winnie, next door to my Gran and Papa and we've known each other for years. She hasn't changed a bit too and still likes doing all the stuff we usually do when we're downtown like checking out all the record and book stores, going for food and to the cinema and so on.

I met her at Royal York station, which is five minutes away from my Uncle Eddie's flat and the station that is nearest to her house and subsequently my Gran and Papa's old house. It's the station that reminds me most of my childhood so I didn't mind walking to it. I dragged April out to a station a little off the beaten track called 'Pape,' (pictured below) so I couldn't resist getting my photo taken next to the sign—Pape is a derogatory term used by some people towards those of the Catholic Faith, so I'm taking it back and empowering it! We hit Sonic Boom records first but my stomach was feeling a little dodgy so I sought out a bathroom along the street in a Starbucks to remedy the situation. I can't think of anywhere better to take a shit than in a soulless, monolithic coffee shop. Back at Sonic Boom I picked up a Blake Babies’ album and an old Juliana Hatfield one, so two purchases more or less in the same ballpark but they are harder to come by back home. Could have easily gotten more CDs but some were pretty expensive and I reckon for some bands/artists I can get their stuff cheaper back home. We stooped for a shawarma on our way down Yonge St—the guy in there probably knows my name by now given the business he's had from me. Outside there was a black guy dressed in Saudi attire carrying a replica Stanley Cup he had made from cardboard and tin foil. So he was our nutter for today, albeit a harmless one.


A trip to HMV proved fruitless, but in Sunrise Records, I got my Uncle Eddie and Fe two excellent foreign DVDs: The Lives Of Others and Black Book—both starring the fantastic actor Sebastian Koch (pictured below). It's always hit or miss with DVDs because my Uncle Eddie sees so many films, but I gambled on those two. I picked up some Disney-themed toys for my niece Monica and a Nintendo DS game fr my other niece Maria, so it's obvious which one is older. Again, a Nintendo DS game is a gamble, as Maria seems to have quite a few. As for myself I was trying to get a Boston Celtics tracksuit top, which was $90, but the Adidas store never had them in my size. I was cursing my luck until I happened upon the same top in Sportchek, which was cheaper by $20 and despite going over the stitching with a fine tooth comb and realising some of it wasn't the best, I decided to get myself one.


We hit a place called Johnny Rockets (pictured below) for food after we were shopped out. It's identical in all but name to the Irish chain known as Eddie Rockets. It's an old-school style diner with 1950s music, burgers, hot dogs, shakes and all that jazz. I plumped for a chili dog and a strawberry milkshake—a combination that seemed to make April gag a little but it was good. Headed back home after that. I suggested catching a movie but April was working at 4am so it was a no-go. Promised to meet her again before I flew home.


Back at Uncle Eddie's, my Aunt Margaret phoned. She wanted to take me to some place called 'Enzo's' in Mississauga when I go there at the weekend. As I'd still to see Margaret Rose—my Dad's cousin—I thought I could double that up but those two don't get along anymore so my Aunt Margaret ruled it out. I love visiting family, but sometimes trying to please everyone can be more than a little draining!

Day 13

Day 13, unlucky for some, not really for me though. The sun was splitting the sky this morning and I had my guitar for company—proper order! As Fe was away to work, I had the house to myself so I could belt out the songs at the top of my voice, which always helps as you can get a real feel for how it would sound live. Moreover, I really hope it was some sort of payback for the killer driller next-door, shoe on the other foot so to speak! I was a little ropey but I knew I'd by fine by the time the gig came along. Setlist for the gig is as follows: Sister I'm A Prophet, I Just Need Your Love, Falling (Sister Seashore), I Love You But You're Blue, Oh My Darling Adeline followed by a few covers too, perhaps: Jesus Don't Want Me For A Sunbeam, The Outdoor Type and maybe Sally Cinnamon (pictured below).


Headed downtown for a bit just to get some fresh air and wander around prior to meeting my Uncle Eddie for the Toronto Maple Leafs game against the Ottawa Senators, which I was pretty excited about. I proved myself to be an absolute glutton again. Had a chicken shawarma for lunch and then promptly went a couple of doors down and had a mammoth pizza slice too! I realised that I'd lost my lottery ticket—the one that I won last week—so maybe the Day 13 bad luck was kicking in after all! I decided to buy another one but imagine the one I lost turned out to be a winner! I'd never know! Was planning on buying a Maple Leafs varsity jacket too but they didn't have it in my size dammit! I visited Sonic Boom records (pictured below) today also—located just near Bathurst subway station—which is my favourite record store in the entire world! I kid you not the selection is frightening, much better than the monolithic music stores everywhere else that have no character and a shite selection of music. April loves the place too. They always have hard to find music like The Blake Babies too so I usually pick up some of their CDs, saves having to go through the amazon rigmarole.


Met up with Uncle Eddie at the Real Sports Bar (pictured below), which is a giant edifice full of giant screens, hockey nuts and easy-on-the-eye barmaids—bit a positive discrimination there from the HR guy, and it's definitely a guy! The Champions League games were on too, which was great for two reasons: firstly it shows the growing popularity and availability of 'soccer' now in North America but also I could watch Rangers being slaughtered 3-0 by Valencia! To enhance the experience I had a pulled pork sandwich with fries, was pretty good too, no complaints from the ever-expanding me!


When we arrived in the Air Canada Centre I was pretty awestruck—it was a lot bigger than I had expected and although our seats were way up high, the view was still great. I was snap happy all night and mesmerised by the experience—I think some Canadians take ice hockey and the Maple Leafs (pictured below) for granted, possibly the same way we do with football and Celtic back home. I love all the razzmatazz associated with North American sports too, although it was a bit more sombre due to Remembrance Sunday coming up, so some veterans were paraded before the game. The only slightly annoying thing is that the game stops when a commercial break is coming up—capitalism in action! During one of these game breaks, we were introduced to two young ice hockey players, one of who said his favourite food was salad, the other said his favourite singer was Elton John! Surely to God they were lying, they were about nine for fuck sakes! Either that or Canadian kids are a bit weird. The game itself wasn't the greatest and the Senators ran out 3-2 winners, but I was just happy to say that I'd seen a Maple Leafs game in the home of ice hockey and seen them score a couple of goals too. At least the Canadian team won! I now understand what the guy from Detroit was prattling on about—even at the ice hockey, the fans were pretty quiet for the most part.

Day 12

Decided the lazy theme should continue for a couple of days so slept long and now that the killer-driller next door seemed to have gone, that was easily done! Had breakfast/lunch with Fe and I mean it in the loosest possible sense, it was just toast. Not really a big breakfast eater. Headed downtown after that to replace the capo that I inadvertently destroyed the other day and also to pick up some contact lens solution. Truly riveting stuff I'm sure you'll agree. Before I went out however, I left a message on facebook alluding to the fact that I was delighted to be going to see Wicked even if it was two years later than planned. I think I had to remind my ex that she was an asshole and the dig was fully intended. With that off my chest I made my way into town and got some contact lens solution at a Shoppers Drug Mart easy enough, but I couldn't be arsed traipsing up Yonge St to that tiny guitar store so I went west on Queen St and my bearings were still spot on as Steve's Music Store (pictured below) was there where I'd left it the last time I was here. It's amazing how, even if you've been away from a place for a good while, you can still find it. That's why I love to wander around places so that I can retain a picture of it in my mind, and sometimes, it even creeps into my dreams. The weather here has been great too, hardly any rain, just dry and sunny cold, the best kind of winter!


Went back to my Uncle Eddie's flat as we were going for a Chinese buffet at a place called the Imperial Palace or something like that. To call it a mere Chinese buffet is probably doing it a disservice as it had Korean, Japanese and Western grub too, hot and cold, and a myriad of desserts. I attacked everything in a manner in which my sister, who loves Canadian-style Chinese buffets, would have been immensely proud of! I've said it one and I'll say it again, if I lived here I would be a fat bastard due to the portion sizes and value for money.

Went home, waistline bulging, to get ready for The Dandy Warhols (pictured below) gig. This was the second time I've seen them play Toronto, believe it or not. The last time was in September 2008 at a place called Guvernment, which was pretty big and overpriced. I had my kilt on that time, which attracted criticism from a hobo who referred to me as 'Rowdy Roddy Piper,' and plaudits from a birthday party from Montreal/Toronto who kinda took me under their wing that night. This time I was on my lonesome and unkilted as I had to get the subway home and thought that it might attract the attention of too many transport weirdoes than normal. The gig venue, the Phoenix Theatre, was smaller but had a better sound as the crowd were packed in as opposed to dispersed, so that always helps with the atmosphere!


I met, what I think were a couple of gay guys, Jonathan and Eduardo from Detroit and Colombia respectively. They may actually have been a bonafide couple but my gaydar is shite. Jonathan was a proper muso and I got on great with him—not in that sense. He knew his UK music too, which is always refreshing and he was a huge Stone Roses fan like myself, good fella! He seemed unimpressed by the support act Blue Giant—a kinda bluegrass cum country Mumford and Sons type band—as he kept sticking his fingers in his ears. I took that as a sign! He was also less than complimentary about Courtney Taylor-Taylor either, as he had met him the night before at The Black Angels gig and said he was a bit of a surly dick.

Anyway, one of the main gripes I have with The Dandy Warhols is that they usually pick the wrong set, but tonight they got it spot on with a great selection of their best tracks: Not If You Were The Last Junkie On Earth, Everyday Should Be A Holiday, Bohemian Like You, Boys Better, The Last High, Godless. Every one a classic. The crowd though, were bizarrely subdued. Jonathan said that was common with a Canadian crowd. In Scotland, the folk in the middle of the crowd would have been drenched in sweat and beer and wouldn't have minded too much, the band wouldn't have either! The only bad thing about an otherwise excellent gig and this is a pet hate of mine, are the clowns who come in late and stand right in front of you. One guy, who looked like a cross between a grizzly bear/Neanderthal man and a serial killer, seemed to have the ability to sleep standing up! Unfortunately, he didn't just stand in front of me, he stood pretty much on me, so I had to dig him a few times to get him to move, which was a risky move given he was almost a foot taller than me—and I'm 6ft 3"—and he looked like a Bond villain (pictured below). Eventually he scuttled off to sleep standing up somewhere else, the crazy bastard. After an aggressive end to the gig from the band, I got my jacket, gave Jonathan one of my band's CDs and go the subway home—which was safe as houses by the way—to slumberland!